Sometimes when I look back at life,important people and how life has shaped,I’m amazed. There is so much we try and control,but life chooses to control us. I remember as a teenager worrying about my life choices as I took Humanities and decided to pursue Psychology.The only thing over the years,that has remained constant is the ability to dream, to be passionate about work and somewhere perceptive about people.Life amazed me by providing opportunities,when I saw none.I have always wondered if being good,being punctual and choosing to follow your heart works?
It does work only if we choose to be patient.Somewhere in your 30’s sometimes you feel like you are coming to being. Who said life stops at thirty? May be when you are in your 30’s,you allow life to happen to you. As I write this,I think of a yacht party I went to,where overlooking the seas,I felt I was ready to surrender.I remember when I was 20 years, I had this dream,which continues to inspire me and over years now I have understood it.
I saw these two lines
Faith to Fathom
Strength to Surrender
It’s strange how I oscillate when it comes to faith nd then strangely find it comforting in moments.Its so many years since the dream happened,but I guess Im beginning to see what it means to surrender.
One of the most well researched story and quite some shocking revelations out there! Must read. Well written by Gayatri Jayaraman http://m.indiatoday.in/story/religion-of-the-unfaithful-adultery-divorce-marriage-relationship/1/399472.html
So my daughter saw an Idea commercial and felt that it was prejudiced in it’s outlook towards women. So here is my story about how my 5 year old daughter learnt to be socially conscious.Sometimes I feel my social service genes and attitude has rubbed off.Any opinions?
Sometimes I feel there are so many stories of pain, struggle, hope and resilience buried deep within me.These are tales, that clients have trusted me with and they are sacred.I’m sure clients wonder,what do I do with them.They continue to live a silent life within me and no one has access to them.I remember,when I was in college,a friend of me would tell me how I love listening to stories.Somehow in psychotherapy, I do that.When people ask me, what do I do,I say, I listen.I create a facilitative environment where people can share and be themselves. It’s a privelege to be trusted.Sometimes,when clients walk in the room, with their pain,all I can see is the strong will power to recover and hope.I see courage that each client brings in,every time, they choose to share their deepest buried secret.I owe gratitude to them and that’s why I let the story lie deep within the recesses of my mind and soul.
There are moments,when I feel lost and what comes to my rescue is an idea,lines from a book and then the strength to move on.Some of us turn inward when faced with a crisis,or a depressing moment and then there are others who turn outwards to people,engaging with the community.Sometimes it is important to remember that Kafka,Rilke,Camus and Yalom have all the answers.I remember as child I used to be immersed in books and continued to seek solace in their company.Strangely,these books have moved in to my therapy sessions and some clients need an idea,that cognitively resonates with them and then emotionally liberates them.For some of us, a writer is more magical than a therapist,it transports us to the hidden terrains within our own self,that sometimes are layered with so much conditioning.
Somewhere deep in the corner of all our hearts lies sadness. A little criticism,a life event, sense of rejection and sometimes the lack of inherent meaning of life triggers it all. Then all of a sudden,sadness chooses to reside in us,slowly becoming the permanent resident in our body.So where do we draw the line? Can we choose or learned helplessness it is? What you do with your sadness is a personal choice. I drown my sadness in writing and some drown it in running , exercising.The trick is to find healthy adaptive ways to be mindful of the sadness and yet allow it to pass by engaging with life.Sometimes choose to substitute sadness with pleasant memories and remind ourselves gently how resilient we are. Remember that sadness distorts us and our self esteem.I’m reminded of a song by Coke Studio,Madari Madari, we need not supress the emotions, but we can train the mind to happiness.The key to training our mind,lies within.